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Seeing Red - It's NOT About My Past!
Do you literally see red sometimes?
You know, the times when you feel like someone else takes over – you are no longer in control?
That’s what happened to my client.
Gloria’s Story…
Gloria was at the station a lot earlier than expected – she was so excited about seeing her first grandchild for the first time! She just couldn’t wait to get on that earlier train and be whisked to her family. Perfect!
But there was one little problem...
The Platform Ticket Inspector wouldn’t allow Gloria to get on an earlier train with her advanced (prepaid) ticket! Her wonderful excited feelings flew out of the window! This well-dressed, softly spoken, well-educated new grandmother saw RED!
Stress Attack! Instantly Gloria's stomach started churning, her palms started to sweat profusely. She felt like a flood had occurred in her brain. All rational thinking took a holiday. Thoughts rushed around her head: “The trip would have to be cancelled,” “She wouldn’t be allowed on the train,” “There were no more trains this evening” etc. etc. It was such an upsetting experience, that she really just wanted to floor this irritating man in front of her! Luckily, however, she was allowed on a train two hours later.
Happy Event Turned Sour
So, Gloria's whole happy experience of going to visit her grandchild turned into a drama. Not only did she want to hit the man, she felt her stomach and insides continue churning over and over for many days Her thoughts were also spiraling out of control. “That’s the trouble with these people and the rigid systems they work for!” “The systems have always made things difficult!” etc.
So, what’s going on here? The first thing to realize is that when we get really angry, we can see it as a gift; Yes, you heard right, “a gift.”
Why on earth would I say that about someone who is driving you crazy, you may well ask?!!!
Well, hang in there with me a little while and I will try to explain how I see it now. I used to get really upset with people to the point of avoiding them at all costs – even when I had to be in the same room with them. Whatever they said to me (and/or their tone of voice), and maybe the way they looked at me just triggered me off to feeling the anger rising and seeing red.
Now I used to blame them …. it was their fault that I was feeling angry, wasn’t it?! They were the ones who said those words in that certain tone of voice, and how they looked at me – so it was their fault I saw red, right?
Well, there’s good news and there’s bad/good news …
Firstly, the bad/good news is, they aren’t to blame … in fact they are giving you a gift; a gift of awareness.
Secondly, the good news is, it isn’t their fault… in fact, it puts you in control of your life, your emotions! Your life! How great is that?!
Yes, I know, hang in there a minute … I will explain further… Rewind 50 years…
When I was a highly sensitive little girl, it didn’t take much to upset me. In fact, it was a common occurrence. Was our family perfect? Not in the least. Like most other families, we had our issues; however, I really took things personally and really held onto that anger when issues arose within my family unit.
I really wanted to make sure I remembered how that anger felt so that when it happened again, it would help protect me – child’s logic.
But it didn’t protect me… it only hurt me more – not them. Every time my anger was triggered, my stress response was triggered, over and over, and over again.
And over the years…
Causing me a whole boatload of stress over my lifetime and generally making me feel anxious and/or overwhelming sad feelings most of the time. The older I became the more power this anger, this trapped emotion from unresolved issues, had over me.
But the good news is! I did something about it. I learnt how to heal my unresolved emotional energy trapped in my body and therefore, my life. And now, I’m working with others like Gloria who also had anger stored in her body that had roots in her past:
Anger at feeling rejected by her family. Favoritism … Gloria's dad thought boys were more important; he groomed them from an early age to take over the family business. In addition, all inheritance went to the boys not the girls.
Constant Bullying. Gloria's favoured younger brother continually bullied his younger brother (who now suffers from mental health issues) and this really angered Gloria.
Mum told Gloria on a regular basis: “Why can’t you be more like your cousin?”
It’s all about the past…
However, Gloria felt like she had had a relatively good childhood compared with others; a lot of positive experiences. She didn’t realize that her current anger issues that were making her feel anxious and out of control were stemmed from her anger rooted in her past; towards her younger bullying sibling, her mum wanting her to be like someone else, or her dad for caring more about the future of his sons than his daughters. Because of these understandably infuriating experiences, the affect caused her to slowly loose her sense of self-worth and chipped away at her self-esteem over time.
And now, after working with me, Gloria is in control of her emotions. The nature of life is that difficulties can pop up at any time, however now she is confident of handling these situations rationally, without anger and stress.
Does any of this resonates with you?
If so, please contact me for a FREE Emotional Discovery Call to see if we can work together to help you feel lighter, brighter and more in control of your feelings; Finding that inner peace that has alluded you for so long.
My name is Lorraine M. Biggs and I invite you to join me on your FREE Emotional Discovery Call to explore and discover:
Clarity: Both around where you are now and where you want to be
Are you experiencing uncontrollable anger incidences?
How are they negatively impacting your life?
Mining for Gems: During this call, I will guide you through a meditative visualisation process to help you rediscover an inner resource. Once rediscovered, this inner resource is yours to help you (within a second) when you most need it.
Contact Me: https://www.lorrainembiggs.co.uk/contact
FREE OFFER: However, if you feel that it's too soon to chat, I do understand. So to help you to get to know me a little better, click here to get your free MP3 recording to help you become a more empowered speaker in an instant: https://www.lorrainembiggs.co.uk/empowered-speaker
